So much has changed since I last posted, I have lots to talk about. I don't want this to turn into a diary, but I have learned a lot of difficult lessons in the last month and I decided to share.
I was working two jobs and going to school full time 6 months ago. Life was very, very busy, but I was making it work. I was working at the local Grocery and at the University where I went to school. I graduated in May, taking school out of the equation, but also taking out the second job. I have been struggling to make it work and did for a couple months, but finally decided I was too far behind and needed to move back home to my parents. It was a hard decision. As a 27 year old that has mostly been on my own since I was 19, I really feel sheepish living in my parents' basement. (Bahahah.) This is the best decision though, and I know that after a few months I will finally catch up with bills and get back on track. The biggest lesson here is that I should have done this a long time ago. My parents are wonderful and have more than welcomed me into their home. They have tried their best to make me comfortable and help me out in any way they can. I am very lucky and should have realized this before getting so behind with my finances. I will come out of this ok, and I know that, but I know now that its ok to take help and its ok to take a step backwards sometimes to get out of the mud and back on the path.
So I have made progress on the money issues, and I have moved back to my parents... Now on to friends. I seem to have always had one best friend my entire life. Before I started kindergarten I met Naomi, and we were best friends until late junior high. We have always stayed friends, more like acquaintances now, but when I was in 8th grade I met a friend Abby. Actually, she rode my bus and it was the late bus. While waiting for the bus everyday, I 'made' her give me money to buy food from the vending machine. The funny part of this story is that I was like 3'6" and Abby was like 5'7". Yea. I made her. I was tough for my size. Anyway, eventually she said no but I could share hers or something along those lines, and we became friends. She lived down the street from me and we were together constantly. Also, in 7th grade I made a friend when I started horseback riding lessons. I had started riding a year or two earlier, but hated the people I rode with. Well, one of them, Nell, ended up hating the rest of them, too, and so we became friends. We were friends mostly at the barn at first, then when I moved to the high school we spent a lot more time together because Abby was younger and wasn't in high school yet. I was still friends with Abby, but not as close. Nell and I were inseparable in high school, and have been best friends ever since! Big lesson: what happened to Abby? Well, when I moved away when I was 19, we kept talking about seeing each other when I was in town and we kept putting it off. Then, one day I was told she slipped in the shower and hit her head and then fell asleep and never woke up. Officially, all I know was that it was an 'accident in the home,' but I think about it every day. I never got to see her again. We may not have next week or even tomorrow to see someone again. It has really been on my mind a lot lately. I even visited Abby on my birthday, because I wanted to share it with her.
I think the reason that this is all coming flooding back is because I have a new best friend! Yes, exclamation point! It's not like before, where one friend fades away and a new one gets closer. Nell is still my best friend, and I cherish that very much. In fact, she had another best friend, Tricia, that I have recently gotten closer to, so now all THREE of us are best friends! lol... I know this is of little importance to you, but I feel extremely lucky lately. To have two friends who love each other and love me, I feel like Abby is looking over me and smiling. I try to not take their friendship for granted, and know that each day I have with them is a gift.
That is the hardest lesson I have ever had to learn. I miss Abby everyday, and think of her all the time. I hope she knows how much I love her.
